Basta Pinoy Driver, Sweet Motherf.....!

New LTO Requirements for PUV Driver's License Applicants:

1. Must be 16 years of age and above.
2. Must have at least 5 experiences of drunk driving, and getting caught.
3. Must be a racing freak.
4. Must know how to beat the red light.
5. Must be disrespectful to passengers.
6. Must know how to smoothly give money without anyone noticing.
7. Must be passenger-greedy.

*based on my experiences of jeepney drivers.

The Parable Of Bill Gates

This is a funny story I've read in high school...

"On year 20XX, Bill Gates died and was sent to St. Peter for evaluation. When he was in front of St. Peter, who holds the key to Heaven, St. Peter said, 'Hmm, you're Bill Gates, the one who invented Microsoft. According to our data, it is not known if that is a good or a bad thing, so I am advised to give you a chance to pick either Heaven or Hell.'

'Well, that's good,' said Bill Gates. 'Can I see both of them before I make a choice?'

St. Peter nodded and led Bill Gates inside Heaven, where he saw angels in flowing white dresses, each with a contented smile on his or her face. 'This isn't bad,' he thought to himself. Then, turning to St. Peter, he said, 'Okay, I have my fill of Heaven. Can I see what's in Hell?'

And so they went down into the depths of the Earth towards Hell, and what Bill Gates saw was surprising. Hell was a big tropical island, with bikini-clad girls and festivals and fireworks every night. 'This is fun!' he thought.

They returned to the waiting area. St. Peter now asked Bill Gates, 'Where would you like to stay?'

Bill Gates answered, 'Heaven is an okay place, but Hell rocks!!! I want to stay there!'

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he vanished and was send immediately to Hell.

A week later, St. Peter went to Hell to check how Bill Gates was faring. He went to a cave where Bill Gates was chained by his wrists over an ever-burning bonfire on his feet.

'ST. PETER, WHAT HAPPENED??? WHERE IS THE BEACH AND THE BIKINI-CLAD GIRLS AND THE FESTIVALS AND THE FIREWORKS?!?!' he screamed at St. Peter as fires licked the soles of his feet.

And St. Peter replied, 'Oh, those things? They were just part of the screen saver.'"

Ang Pag-asa sa Mukha ng Taong Grasa

Habang ako'y nakasakay sa jeep,
Napatingin ako sa labas at napa-isip.
Titigil pa kaya ang pag-agos ng mga lihim na luha,
Sa mukha ng isang taong grasa?

Sa malupit na mundo at buhay,
May pagkakataon pa ba siyang makita ito ng may kulay?
Kung wala man lang lilingon sa kanyang kinatatayuan,
Hindi kaya niya maisip na ang buhay niya ay walang kabuluhan?

Maari'y meron pa siyang nakikitang liwanag,
Kaya siya pilit na nagpapakatatag.
At doon ko na lamang nakita,
Ang pag-asa sa mukha ng taong grasa.

Bahala Na Si Batman

Ayan na, malapit na ang exams. Hindi ka pa nagaaral. Ano ang sasabihin mo?

"Badtrip, di ako nag-aral. Bahala na nga si Batman!!!"

Bakit nga ba natin ipinapaubaya kay Batman ang lahat sa oras ng kagipitan?

Kung titignan mo, si Batman ay isang ordinaryong nilalang lamang, walang kapangyarihan at hindi immortal. Ano naman ang magagawa niya kung sakaling marinig niya ang tawag mo?

Sa tingin ko, simple lang ang sagot. Alam natin na walang ibang makakatulong sa atin. Walang kakaibang pwersa ang kayang magpabago sa sitwasong ating hinaharap. Tanging tayo lamang ang kayang gumawa ng paraan kung paano papatakbuhin ang ating buhay.